Friday, September 09, 2005

Sticky eyes [updated]

Eww, I've got really sticky horrible conjunctivitousy eyes. Vile. Really so nasty. I've not been to the doctor yet. It feels like I've been kicked in the face ... and odd how my stomach has come out in sympathy with it.

I've bought myself some Optrex Infected Eyes. I think they're the first ever 'over-the-counter antibiotics ever invented! They're probably rather low level though ... and they hopefully won't be tempting super humungus mutant bacteria to warp and grow and take over the planet with their hyperintelligent hyperimmune hyperbioticness.

If I squeezed enough 'Optrex Infected Eyes' down the drain, would London die? Would the sewer rats then be OK to eat?

[update] I am still sitting at my desk at work. It's raining out there, we've had a big thunderstorm over West London this afternoon. Am waiting for a cab home whcih I'm told will be delayed by an hour. My eyes are so puffy and conjunctivitisy and I feel a bit rubbish so I slid down in my chair a weeny bit to rest. My eyes are so puffy that they must lok half closed. My colleague Brendan just came back to the office and, in a concerned way, shouted over: "Damon, are you asleep?" Now paranoid that i Look half asleep most of the time here at work. News 24 7 o'clock headlines about to happen ... ore is it BBC World I've got on . Must say am enjoying seeing Nick Robinson back on BBC politics duty.


Lady Bracknell said...

Lady Bracknell assumes from your flights of fancy concerning the comestible potential of vermin that you may be running a fever.

She recommends that you rest up, and treat yourself to a basin of nourishing soup. In the creation of which no rats have perished.

Katie said...

You poor love, Damon!

Did you rub them hard, that sometimes brings conjunctivitus on.

Hope you have a good rest and that you feel better soon.

Thinking of you lots, Damon.
Always there for you when you need me!

KJ McLean said...

I should not have been eating yogurt while reading this post.

Damon said...

Karen, my eyes are still bad and frankly I'd suggest that they currently feel as if they have a significant layer of strawberry bio yoghurt with meusli and poppy seeds under the eyelids. Thanks for asking ;)